Molly

So, I’ve just dropped Molly off at the vet for ‘tests’.

Not an experience I was looking forward to. Last Christmas I took Manny to the vet because although his belly was always full he seemed to be losing weight. A few tests later and it turned out he had cancer wrapped around and constricting his stomach – the fullness was caused by fluid collecting in his belly.

The vet had him all day and phoned mid-afternoon to see what I wanted to do, have them put him down while he was still under general anaesthetic or they could wake him up so we could say goodbye. I was on my own and he was a family cat so I decided (through floods of tears) to let them wake him up so we could say goodbye – I just couldn’t deny my family that. It was awful.

I’m in a similar situation again. Molly’s breathing started getting laboured so we took her in and the vet said it could be tumours, but then it could be bronchitis, or pneumonia, or a hundred other things they couldn’t find out without tests. He also noticed one eye was slightly damaged on one side – could be tumours too, or trauma. It’ll be very expensive says the vet, like a builder quoting for a driveway – we could just put her down? No. NO! I told him she could never be too inconvenient or costly. Unless she’s in pain or discomfort she’s not going anywhere.

Which she isn’t, neither according to the vet or pure observation. That was Friday and she’s been at home all weekend. The vet gave her a short-term steroid/antibiotic and said if her breathing got better it was the worst news. Well, her breathing didn’t get any better but her eye got a bit worse and now her pupil looks like a diamond on one side and doesn’t open fully. She’s eating fine and acting just the same as usual. When I took her to the vet this morning she didn’t bat an eyelid.

So I have to sit here waiting for the phone to ring – just like last time. They’re testing for feline AIDS and leukaemia, doing a chest x-ray then they’re going to ring me when they get the results back to make a decision.

Decision? I don’t want to have to make the same one as before. We’ve had Moll for 11 years, but we don’t know how old she was when we got her so she could be a bit older. She’s a self-imposed house cat, and it’s quite odd to not know where she is. But, we have to remember that she won’t be here forever regardless of what the tests find and at some point we’re going to have to let her go.

Hopefully not just yet.

Beccy